I Prayed

 

So there I sat hungry and thirsty so I prayed to Edesia and an overwhelming desire to look in the refrigerator came over me. When I opened the door what do I behold but last night’s leftovers, truly I was blessed by Edesia.

As I warmed the banquet I heard a voice tell me to look in the cupboard. At first I saw nothing, but a strange light appeared on a lower shelf and as I moved some boxes I found a bottle of red wine that I had forgotten about; a miracle! Truly I was blessed by Bacchus, and now must sing his praises, and pour some of the wine in his honor.

Praise to the gods! Praise to Edesia and Bacchus who provide us such sustenance! The gods are fickle but sometimes they bless us in the smallest ways. Who would dare say otherwise?

 

 

 

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Comments (29)

  1. writerfromindia

    Nice.

    August 03, 2012
    1. JumperK

      Thanks. Now I don’t have to call down a pox on you and yours and interrupt my wine drinking.

      August 03, 2012
      1. writerfromindia

        No,you don’t have to.Enjoy your wine.

        August 03, 2012
        1. JumperK

          Thanks, have a great day.

          August 03, 2012
          1. writerfromindia

            You too have a great day.

            August 04, 2012
          2. writerfromindia

            You too have a great day.

            August 04, 2012
  2. Thompsons

    Poverty!!

    November 02, 2012
    1. JumperK

      Pardon?

      November 03, 2012
      1. Thompsons

        Pardon what?

        November 16, 2012
        1. JumperK

          Your poverty comment, what ever do you mean?

          November 18, 2012
  3. drew

    we all know gods provide small bt only Gad provides big things

    August 12, 2014
    1. JumperK

      So you think there are more than one god?

      August 12, 2014
  4. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Why post your nonsense? The second point made me laugh because god has apparently been seen by man, at least part of him. God supposedly showed his buttocks to Moses, which is strange and seems to show god is a homosexual.

      August 03, 2015
  5. This comment has been deleted
  6. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Exodus 33:22 And it shall come to pass, while my glory passeth by, that I will put thee in a clift of the rock, and will cover thee with my hand while I pass by:
      33:23 And I will take away mine hand, and thou shalt see my back parts: but my face shall not be seen.

      Clearly god thinks his buttocks fine enough to show Moses. Sounds like your god is a little gay. Know your fairy tale bible better.

      August 03, 2015
  7. This comment has been deleted
  8. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Back parts, it doesn’t mention your god’s anus specifically, but it doesn’t rule out the temptation of Moses giving a rim job to that divine ass of god. Yup, sounds like your god likes his kinks “homoerotic”.

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
        1. JumperK

          Why can’t a man see your god’s face, is your god not all-powerful? What, god’s ass is less glorious than the rest of him? Meh, screams god is Gay.

          August 03, 2015
          1. This comment has been deleted
            1. JumperK

              You mean to say this weak god of yours could not make himself visible to a mere mortal? How very lame.

              August 03, 2015
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  10. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Well your god is a shitty communicator who could not even produce a single nondestructible, easily understood book with his wishes clearly laid out.

      August 03, 2015
  11. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Yes, your bible is a version, and like the children’s game of telephone, wildly inaccurate. The bible has been changed, edited, and translation errors have occurred, without the original, all copies are as reliable as the story of Goldilocks and the 3 bears.

      August 03, 2015
  12. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      They have also been changed to suit the author’s wishes. But the history of the bible’s numerous edits and changes to suit the desire and wishes of man is lost on you. That your god could not produce a book that didn’t require translation and edits is yet another mark against a god/gods existence.

      August 03, 2015
  13. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Again you give evidence for why your god is so fucking pathetic. He can’t even produce one single book easily understood by all who open it over the centuries.

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
        1. JumperK

          You’re missing the fucking point. Your god supposedly created a book that you yourself said requires translation, it causes strife because of the fact there are so many versions and interpretations. Your weak, small thinking god did not even have the foresight to produce a single, nondestructable book, easily understood by anyone opening the cover over the centuries.

          August 03, 2015
          1. This comment has been deleted
            1. JumperK

              I’ve decided you really are not that bright, so I will type slower and hope you clue in. Many people, billions even, claim to understand the bible. The trouble is there are billions of different interpretations with everyone claiming they have it right. I am saying that if your fucked up god actually existed and was an excellent communicator, he would have produced one single indestructible book, immediately understood by anyone, in any language, at anytime in history. There would be no need for edits, translations or confusion. He could pass his message much better than through some book as well.

              August 03, 2015
  14. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      Nope, not the same thing. The simpleton you worship can’t figure out a way to show himself to a mortal without killing him? The best he can do his flash his ass?

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
        1. JumperK

          There are many versions of the bible that clearly state your god showed Moses his ass.

          August 03, 2015
          1. This comment has been deleted
  15. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      That is right, don’t question things and be a good little follower of your cult. Your god was so stupid that he could not even find a way to speak to his creations without scarring them.
      I guessed wrong, I don’t think you are even 15.

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
  16. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      No, but judging by the quality of your arguments, you lack both.

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
        1. JumperK

          It is painfully obvious that there is plenty you don’t know little troll.

          August 03, 2015
          1. This comment has been deleted
            1. JumperK

              Still here troll?

              August 03, 2015
  17. This comment has been deleted
  18. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      A leader, one who dares to question.

      August 03, 2015
      1. This comment has been deleted
        1. JumperK

          I am a leader.

          August 03, 2015
          1. This comment has been deleted
            1. JumperK

              Great and fuck you very much.

              August 03, 2015
  19. This comment has been deleted
    1. JumperK

      And I am always here when you want to get in touch with reality.

      August 03, 2015